FBC: an anchor in turbulent times
by Debbie Harmon Ferry
Most of you know that Dave and I are in a second marriage. We are a blended family. That comes with some challenges. Most second families are born out of either death or divorce, that means their very foundation is often rooted in grief and loss and sometimes even anger and guilt. It’s tricky. Even trickier when you add uprooting and relocating kids and trying to blend parenting styles – not just with each other but also with the other parents living in other homes. I am not really complaining. We were relatively lucky. We have good kids.
We looked for a church home that would welcome and support our less than traditional looking family. At the time, Jacob and I had started attending FBC and Dave and his kids were attending church in Salem. I don’t want to say who won the battle, but I will say Dave is now the moderator here. 😉
We are so grateful for the many ways that FBC was a church home (or an anchor) for us the and the kids. The older kids loved their involvement with the YAHOO Mexico mission. The younger ones liked participating in the Christmas pageants and reading the scripture.
Then about five years ago, we hit the challenge round. The kids’ mom got a diagnosis of stage IV cancer. Just over two years ago she passed away. That brought with it another round of challenges. The kids were grieving, we sort of had to redefine ourselves yet again. There was a lot of stress and pain and grief and change.
I needed some consistency and an anchor. Erika and Sean were there for me, and for Dave, and for the kids. They reached out and checked on us. They offered support. There were people in the congregation like Mary Martin – who I know were invested in our kids and kept them in their prayers. I was buoyed by the Dressels who are such a wonderful example of a blended, non-traditional family and that gave us hope.
We felt cared for by this FBC community. We made it through that rough patch. Now we are doing well, and we hope that we can be there for others in this church family who are suffering loss or going through rough times.
For me the anchor is an interesting metaphor, but I’d like to offer up another. When choirs sing, they are able to hold sustained notes longer than soloists. It’s not actually because choir singers have a special gift. It is because they take turns carrying the load. So, often without the audience noticing, and sometimes without even planning it, some singers will drop out and take a new breath while other singers sustain the note. They take turns and most folks listening do not even notice.
If you need a breath right now, go ahead, we’ve got you. There are folks here at FBC ready to sustain the note until you are ready to sing again. And if you are in a position to help out so that others can take the moment they need to regroup, please consider giving to FBC so that the church can continue to make beautiful music (literally and figuratively) in these troubled times.